Understanding other people’s emotions can be frustrating, but understanding your own emotional responses can be even more trying. Take this quick self-assessment to build awareness of your automatic responses.

Situation: Customer is angry.
You feel:
A. Angry in the same way as the customer
B. Angry in a different way
C. Honestly, really really good
D. Sad, but unsympathetic, that anyone could care so much about brioche

Situation: Out of twenties and tens, need to make $77 in change
You feel:
A. Foolish for not checking drawer when you signed on
B. Foolish for coming back from lunch
C. Foolish for coming to work today
D. An unrepentant rage as you methodically count out fifteen fives and forty nickels

Situation: You somehow cut finger on Sharpie marker
You feel:
A. Confused, but appreciative of the double irony
B. Angry because…goddammit is NOTHING safe to touch?
C. Pleased that now you have something to talk about at lunch
D. Irritated that the cut wasn’t bad enough to warrant a trip to urgent care

Situation: Customer asks for fork
You feel:
A. Indignant, it is you who should be offering the fork
B. Suspicious, because they are not buying a salad
C. Cruel, and you toss it in their bag so they cannot see you gave them a spoon
D. Numb, this is what your life has become. I mean, it’s not that bad but still, numb.

Situation: Jar of Cowboy Caviar is falling off shelf
You feel:
A. Terror as you watch if plummet inch by inch over the course of 60 seconds
B. Calm, knowing that someone else will deal with it since you’re on reg
C. Mischievous because nobody will know that you pushed it off
D. Excited to take an active part in the economy

Situation: Customer at register acting aggravated, but joking, but maybe angry
You feel:
A. Defensive, because it sounds like maybe they are upset that we don’t sell flan, and while that does seem like something we might sell, they need to check themselves because they are not a child and you’re only going to tell them once to shut the fuck up.
B. Patient, waiting for them to roll through all possible moods until they land on one that sticks.
C. Super mellow, but in a chill way, because like, that’s their deal, you know?
D. Interested to hear how flan has shaped their life like the Colorado river has carved the Grand Canyon. This is your one chance to understand this phenomenon. Listen and absorb so that others may learn from your story. Then try to sell them the Belgian chocolate pudding, because it’s the real deal.

Situation: Captain informs you that you’re getting a raise
You feel:
A. Elated, they really appreciate what you bring to the team
B. Relieved, having to pay for lunches will sting this much less
C. Disappointed, you wish the Captain would open up to you about their life instead of circumscribing the discussion to fiduciary considerations.
D. Curious, if your half-assed efforts got you this raise, how much more would you get if you really tried?

Situation: Mate witnesses you talking to coworker
You feel:
A. Guilty, you know you should focus on stacking the maple syrup right
B. Scared, this is the third time this week they’ve caught you talking and you don’t know if they hate you enough to mention it in your review
C. Confident, you can do something dramatically worse to take their mind off the talking
D. Frustrated, of course they never see you when you are working on lunch!

Situation: Customer is feeling fantastic, claims it’s only a matter of DECIDING to have a good day
You feel:
A. Seething dislike paired with wide friendly smile
B. Fear, this person is unbalanced
C. Excited, a person this privileged may be able to help you with your Plan
D. Meh, at least they appreciated you finding the broken egg

Situation: Dickhead you know from school hired
You feel:
A. Terrified, they will turn them all against you
B. Pleased, their horribleness will draw attention away from your shortcomings
C. Schadenfreude, you can tell everyone how this person got banned from the dorms, and invite them to ask why
D. Malicious, after what they did to you, you will make sure they are cleaning up an oil spill by the end of their first day